A Revival

I haven't been here since August. That's a very long time, and life has shown us several big changes since then.
I think part of me was resigned to the fact that I would give up this blog. Life was busy (as it always is) and I didn't have the time or inspiration to continue to make this space a beautiful one. But I must make a confession - I have been a downright nasty person to be around as of late. My poor, dear, sweet husband has caught the brunt of it and most of the time I didn't even realise how horrible I was being until I saw the hurt in his eyes after an argument settled, or until I heard the anger in his voice.
The only thing I know is that when I am stressed and frazzled, I become un-fun and snappy. I become a lot like a teenager who doesn't like to hear any criticism, but especially the word "no."
I need a therapy, of sorts, to keep myself happy. Expressing goes a long way. I remember back in high school, I used to dump my stresses during my least favourite (and weakest) subject- math. It would have done me a lot more good, academically, to sit and pay attention, but it did more for my state of mind to get out some notebook paper and just write. I wrote poems, short stories, even took a few cracks at novels. Nothing ever came of it and sadly, I've lost most of those poems and stories, but it felt good. Another release I discovered around the same time was photography. I found that, after a teenage argument with my mother, a trip to the desert with my little digital camera did me a lot of good. A few years later, I took a photography course at the community college and invested in a good little starter digital SLR. I would lose myself behind the lense, become engrossed in finding the perfect shutter and f-stop combination, and find delight in tweaking the focus just right. Whatever worries plagued my mind could be easily forgotten. In a world where I so often feel like I have no control, getting behind the viewfinder and manipulating the settings of a camera, taking a world that, to me, in that moment, feels ugly, and changing it into something beautiful with this little machine makes me feel ok and reminds me that there is always beauty to be find.

And so, I resolve to write here regularly again, and to take more pictures. I got my camera out a few weeks ago and it sits on the piano (no, we don't play [though Mick can dabble], but it sure is a great place to set all our crap).

So, what has happened since August? Sheesh. A lot. Let me break it down by month for you.

September:
We celebrated our one year anniversary in London. Mick's mom and dad bought us tickets to see "We Will Rock You," a West End musical based on the music of Queen. Oh, did we love it. I quickly bought all of Queen's greatest hits that I was missing. A few days later I started a new job for a recruitment company that specialises in accountancy and fiance. I do a lot of administrative type work, and it's a really great place to work. The people are great and I'm always kept on my toes. A few days later Mick caught up with me by turning 26. Hah.

November:
I had a nasty cold that stopped me dead in my tracks. Mom sent me some Thanksgiving decorations to get me out of an autumn/germy funk. We celebrated a big of a Celtic Thanksgiving, plus a South African. The food was good and I enjoyed being in the kitchen all day.

December:
The countdown to my biggest wish was dwindling down - on December 15th we hopped on a plane and got to visit home for the first time since I moved here. We spent two weeks with my family, time split between Arizona and Southern California. I caught up with my parents and siblings, loved up on my niece and nephew, and shared good laughs with good friends whom I've missed loads. The time went too fast, and with a confusing mixture of sadness and joy, we came back to England.

February:
Another move... Mick's dad kindly asked us if we'd like to rent his house since he is remarrying and moving in with his lucky lady. We were ecstatic for the opportunity to live in the beautiful village in a lovely house with a lot more space and room to grow.

March:
I passed my driving test the first time (quite an accomplishment in England, the driving tests are brutal here!) and got a new car, a lovely little Skoda which may or may not take a lot of work...

That pretty much brings you up to date. There have been other things in between, which I'll share in photos.

Continuing developing my cooking skills

Spending as much time as possible with this guy

A fair amount of snow this winter (that's our new house from the garden!)

And a lot of ice...

And just enough down-time to keep me going

I'll be back soon, I promise. I've missed this place.

xo

A Slightly Hyper Post

Today I worked from 10am-6pm with a slew of families swinging in and out the door. The comfy, worn in couches scattered about the warm pub were filled with laughter and chit-chat, and my hands were satisfied and sticky from pulling lots and lots of pints. Two o'clock rolled around and my boss said I could take my break. I donned my wool coat and scarf (never thought I'd say that!) and walked across the square to the supermarket to buy a sandwich and a drink. My selections in hand (chicken salad sandwich, strawberry flavored water and sour coke bottles), I paid and exited the store. To my immense puzzlement, as I walked through the sliding doors, I was accosted (ok, not really, I just never pass up an opportunity to use that word. Accosted. Accosted! I love it) by charity collectors holding their plastic coin cup things and wearing... wait for it!.... GIANT DOG COSTUMES. We're not just talking a painted face and ears, people. We're talking the hole getup- a full on furry costume with giant head and everything. Actually, it was probably pretty warm, now that I think about it. Anyway, there was Christmas music blaring from mysteriously placed speakers and booths and things set up. In a daze, I grabbed a few coins from my pocket and chucked them in the cup. The Giant Dog I deposited my money to waved with his big, fake, awkward hands. Character costumes like that have always freaked me out a bit. I don't know, it might be the vow of silence the people who wear them seem to take. It's just weird, okay?!
Anyways, I retreated to the safety of my designated lunch spot- a tree planter with a large base to sit on. I munched on my sandwich and watched the way the light played on the pavers, the sides of brick buildings, and shone around the corner, bursting through a narrow walkway. I fell in love with winter light today. And as I snapped pictures, a children's choir at the charity thing began to sing "Good King Wenceslas," which always reminds me of that scene in the end of Love Actually where Hugh Grant is desperately searching an entire street of houses, asking for the girl he loves, tryyying to find out if she lives there because she only gave him the name of the street she lived on and not the house number. And three little girls open the door and don't realize Hugh Grant is the Prime Minister, because they're like, seven. So they ask if he's a Carol Singer and he starts to sing to humor them. And his driver, who is standing behind him, busts out in this really sexy bass voice, and Hugh Grant does this surprised little face and turns around and looks at the driver. (I tried to find a clip on youtube to no avail). It always makes me smile, as does anything to do with Hugh Grant, and particularly Love Actually. I smiled and snapped pictures until my hands started to go numb, at which point I decided it was probably time to go back to work.

My lunch spot. I love how the concrete and wood eat up the light and hold it tight.

Pavers also enjoy eating the light. Also- I much prefer the footwear of bartending to the footwear of teaching. Vans to work? Yes, please!

This picture literally stops my breath. The way the light bends around the building and down this little walkway. Be still, my heart!

Have a fantastic Saturday, you!

Photo Phrenzy

A new job, coldwetwindy weather, the beginnings of a chest cold (or at the very least, an icky cough) a date night and the house to ourselves this weekend. That was our week.
Have some photos.

Christmas Swagger

It seems to me that even the creepy crawly creatures are getting ready for Christmas.
Even the spiders are puttin' up their swag this year.

Leaving my Problems in my Footprints

Today, I found solace in my run. I haven't gone for one for over a week because I'm really, really good at coming up with excuses. I decided to start my normal route backwards, and then instead of taking the short stretch of trail to the right that quickly circles back into the neighborhood, I decided to turn left on the trail. I felt slightly embarrassed with myself for being so excited at the thought of this. My body felt great running in the woods, with rotten leaves and mud forming a cushion- much easier than running on concrete. It was better for my knees.

It was easy to run today, because Mick and I had this ridiculous argument and quite frankly, I didn't want to go back to the house. I just kept going, and couldn't believe how good it felt in my body to be running. I of course walked a good bit, but I think I ran more on the whole. It was a beautiful route and I think I'll make it my regular jog.
The woods offered multiple little trails, but I wasn't that worried about getting lost because I could still see the houses the entire way (the woods are essentially right in the middle and on the edge of the housing development). I took one little trail that shot off the main one and it led me to a beautiful clearing.

 The trail wrapped around the edge of the circular clearing and led back to the entrance into the woods from where I came. I came upon a woman wearing wellies and walking her chocolate lab who slobbered on me happily. I circled around the clearing and disappeared into the woods again, my anger being eaten away with every step I put between myself and the house.

By the time it started to get dark and I turned for the house (it was very difficult to turn around), I felt pretty excited about running this route every day. This trail is good for my soul. And by the time I reached the house, my real husband (and not the growly bear I left) was waiting for me (now the nice version of myself after a beautiful run) and we were able to talk things over calmly.

Looking forward to my run tomorrow.

Where do your runs take you?

Phriday Photo Phrenzy

My husband's body has been taken over by a Modern Warfaring demon.

I made stuffed peppers for dinner earlier in the week.

Santa is on my coke can. Christmas is nigh!

Cuddles during movie time. "What Lies Beneath" was our movie choice.

Very, very mean bug bite :(

Somebody (daddy) left the treat cup on the floor and left the room... both bunnies took advantage, but here is Harley being naughty :p

Christmas comes fast in England, because they don't have Thanksgiving to break up the time between Halloween and Christmas. I like this and I don't at the same time. I'm hoping to do a little Thanksgiving for us here next Sunday (it's just not practical to do it on a Thursday- nobody gets the day off!), but it will be low-key, because it's my first time cooking all that kind of stuff.
My mother-in-law got us a little 3ft tree to put in our lounge. I'm so excited- I think it would be a nice size to put on the window sill. Because I haven't gotten a job yet and savings are dwindling, I'm going to make pretty paper snowflakes for our ornaments this year with this tutorial. I'll get some glitter pens and make them kind of sparkly. I think it'll be fun.

Hubby's friend is arriving this afternoon for the weekend. Should be a good time.

Happy Friday- have a great weekend!

Oh and ps- I had my national insurance interview yesterday- all went well and my number should arrive in two weeks. In the meantime, I can start looking for work :)

Damp, damp, damp!

A very wet and slippery trail near the house.

Whew! It feels like ages since I've actually sat down and written a real post in here. Life has been in that state of not really busy, but of time flying and you can't really remember what you've been doing. We're still working on getting the house unpacked and sorted. Slowly but surely, it's happening.

I'm a bit baffled by the weather around here lately. The sky is perpetually grey. In fact, I can't remember the last time I saw the sun. Perhaps sometime last week? And even then it was a brief glimpse. I'm not bothered by this, though. I had 14 years of constant sun in Arizona. I like the change. But what really confuses me is the damp. It hasn't really been raining exactly, but it looks like it has. The ground is wet, the grass is covered in little beads of moisture, as are the trees, leaves, berries and twigs. The cars are wet. I don't understand! It's just so damp. You can almost see the moisture in the air, coming down, but not as rain. I'm sure this all seems really normal and unextraordinary to you, but I'm completely nonplussed!

And now it's time for a confession. Sigh.
Last night Mick and I were watching a movie and a guy picked up a girl and spun her around. My heart sank. I've always struggled with my weight, but especially since I was about 18. I'm not one of those people you see walking down the street and go "whoooa!" (no offense to anybody who is, I don't mean to sound rude there). Not by any means, but I am definitely obese, clinically speaking. Anyway, last year I lost loads of weight, mostly due to depression, but once I got happy again, boom! It all came back. I've been talking about working out and eating right again for ages, making promises to myself and to Mick. He doesn't mind that I'm this size, but he supports that I want to be slimmer and healthier. So, when I saw this guy spinning this girl in circles, I made last night the last time I would ever consume an entire pack of anything that was more than a serving (Fig Newtons, in this case). It's not even that I eat horribly, or obscene amounts. I just have this ridiculous metabolism that makes it impossible for me to not gain weight unless I work out. So, it's time I start listening to my body instead of my lazy brain and do what it takes. So today, I woke up and MEASURED MY OATMEAL. Then I went for a jog/walk.
And I have to say... I feel better today than I have for a long time. I feel good about myself because running has always been something that I wanted to do. I envy people who can just throw on a pair of sneakers and get their workout without paying a gym membership or listening to Billy Blanks shout at me on his Tae Bo DVDs to do some ridiculous mixture of steps ONE MORE TIME. Yet he tells me to do it just ONE MORE TIME like FIFTY TIMES. Even though I walked more than I ran, I plan to shift that ratio. It'll just take some practice. So, yeah, my legs felt like wobbly jelly and it felt like I had a chunk of ice in my chest (it was cold out) when I was done, but I felt good about me. I guess I just have to remind myself of that feeling every time I tell myself that I don't feel like working out. And remember to stretch! So that by this time next year, Mick can easily pick me up and spin me around.

How do you motivate yourself to be active? How do you find ways to enjoy it?

And I'm going to leave you with this quote because I've found a few grey hairs in the past year or so (I blame middle school students!). And this sort of puts it in perspective...

"Worrying about gray hair when your weight's soaring out of control is like mowing your lawn when you house is on fire."
-Edward Ugel

This weekend should be good- Mick and I are going to dinner at a friends house. And then house-sitting for his dad again. 
Hope you're all well :)

Photo Dump

Not much news around here- still just trying to get settled in the new house bit by bit.
But here are some photos for you.

Weekend recap

Packing, moving, a date with the husband for no real reason and a quiet night to myself with Sex and the City 2. Just a bit of what we've been up to around here. And some photos.

It's weird how different a house looks when it's nearly empty. And so echo-y, too!

A night on my own- my husband and his step-dad made another trip back to Bognor for one last load of things on Saturday. Mick and I are house/business/cat sitting for his dad this week, so I had the house to myself and enjoyed a bubble bath of mammoth proportions.

Dinner at a historic inn down the road in this darling little village. Good food, good wine, good times <3

Fresh autumn apples from my father-in-law's garden. I'm thinking some baked cinnamon apples are in order with dinner tonight :)

Instagr.am

Some of my friends have been doing this instagr.am thing and I always thought it looked fun and cool. Since I just got the new iPhone (omg I love it!) I thought I'd download the app and try it out. Here are a few from last night and today.


Have a great Saturday, peeps!

Doing what I do, son!

Doesn't he just look like a rock star her? Love this.

Sasha's gorilla face!

Harley! He's getting so big and so flippin cute. He looks like a stuffed animal.

The Daily Shoot- Technology

Wow- two posts in one day! I'm not sure that's EVER happened here! But since I took a bit of a sick day yesterday, I thought I really had to do today's assignment for the Daily Shoot.

October 5, 2011 (Day 689) Assignment:
Make a photograph that illustrates technology today

As you can see, it's a very gloomy day in West Sussex. The sun disappeared early this morning, the wind is blowing and it's feeling like autumn, for sure. And here we have it- a telephone pole. I imagine that the Victorians in England, those proper, overly moral people were very shocked when these things started going up (I'm only guessing it was the late 1800's when these bad boys started going up). But can you imagine how different that would be? To see these things going up all over the place? And not just the visual change, but the change in life, the beginning of the industrial and technological age. What a change!

The Daily Shoot- Humor and Laughter

Today's Daily Shoot assignment was a tough one.

October 3, 2011 (Day 687) Assignment
Make a photograph that expresses humor or laughter today.

Now, I know I should have figured out a way to make Mick laugh and take a picture of it but I honestly just couldn't be bothered today, and he hates having his photo taken. So I cheated. This is an old photo I took a few years ago of a lawn gnome my mom has stashed in the house somewhere, and I'm not sure why. But seriously, who doesn't think lawn gnomes are funny? They make me laugh.

Not much going on around here today. It's finally cooled down a bit, my feet are actually cold as I sit here and type this. Just been doing little things around the house today, planning what to do for dinner tonight, finishing touches on wedding thank you notes. Can you believe the wedding was a month ago yesterday? It feels like so much more to me!

Have a nice Monday, folks! :)

Daily Shoot- Equinox? (not really)

I'm a little bit confused by today's Daily Shoot assignment.

October 2, 2011 (Day 686) Assignment:
It's the solstice. Make a photo that captures the day for you wherever you are.

I'm confused by this because I'm about 99% sure that the autumnal equinox was last week? It's always September 23rd, isn't it? And I'm not even sure that there is a solstice this time of year?
Anyway, the last thing it feels like around here is autumn. About 80F again today. As we walked along the beach, I couldn't believe the amount of people that were there day camping, BBQing, paddling around in inflatable boats, and watching their children splash around in the shallows. The water was really calm, with only a few tiny waves. It was so quiet and still, apart from all the people. It feels like July out there.
However, it is in fact autumn and one of my very favorite holidays is only 29 days away. Halloween! While Mick was mowing the lawn today, I wandered around the garden snapping photos for the assignment. I love how creepy this brick wall looks with the vines that seem to have died while creeping up the bricks. Feels very Halloween-y doesn't it?

Mick and I filled out the forms for my visa application today. We're basically done, we just have to call the border agency tomorrow and clear up a few questions then we can send it off, wait to hear about when my biometrics appointment will be, and then we're done with this step and I can work soon (hopefully)!

What have you done with your Sunday?

Daily Shoot- Communication (and weekend stuff)

Happy Saturday, guys! Hope you all have lovely weekend plans. I've got the house to myself for a bit this afternoon and I had glorious plans of hanging clean laundry out on the line and absorbing some beautiful sunshine. And then the spiders spoiled my plans. They are EVERYWHERE! Their webs are all along the back of the house and in the bushes and hedges out front. And there are loads of little webs all over the line outside, and I'm not about to clean it off, so the laundry went into the dryer.
Instead of soaking up sunshine, I decided to do today's Daily Shoot assignment.

October 1, 2011 (Day 685) Assignment:
Make a photograph that illustrates an aspect of communication.

Here's my homework...

I had a bit of fun editing this one with some basic software. If you love me you can buy me Photoshop :D I played with the saturation and contrast a bit and gave the photo a cool feel. Anyways, I figured everybody who posted for this assignment would be uploading photos of cell phones, Skype, and laptops and emails. I wanted to take it back a notch and focus on the original form of communication over the miles. No, not smoke signals, I don't have that kind of stuff lying around the house! But what I do have is a lot of handwritten correspondence. August and September were pretty busy months for cards- my birthday, the wedding, and Mick's birthday. The house is full of colorful envelopes with interesting stamps with Queen Elizabeth, Ronald Reagan, Liberty Bell, as well as some sort of bird?
Remember life before email and text messaging? It was always so much fun to find a brightly colored envelope with your name on it in the mailbox! Whether it was a card, a letter, or a gift, it was always so exciting, wasn't it?

In other news, today is supposed to be the warmest day in October in England, like, ever.

 Mick and I have the house to ourselves tonight. We're doing a pizza and movie night with lots of cuddles. Tomorrow we're going to get my visa paperwork started.

What are your plans for the weekend?

The Daily Shoot- Break the Rules

 Today's assignment at The Daily Shoot was actually kind of hard for me, as I'm only a baby photographer and don't know tons of "rules" of composition and whatnot. I took a class a few years ago, but I've forgotten a lot in the time my photo taking has been stagnant.

September 30, 2011 (Day 684), Assignment:
"Rules" can be stifling if taken to extremes. Break the rules today with focus, composition, etc, and see what happens

Here's my homework...

I didn't go full blown rebel on this one. I played with composition a bit, mostly just that the object is slightly out of the frame. My photography teacher always said you want to be really careful when you cut something off in a photo- it either needs to be dramatic or not at all, basically. There needs to be a point in cutting something off. I only cut off a bit at the edge, and I also did the focus a bit differently with the parts closest to the camera out of focus and the bottom right in focus, which is the part of the object that's further away. This isn't really rule breaking, just a bit different from what I'd normally do. I'm not sure if it's a big success as the assignment, but I like it.

Not much news- it's been unseasonably warm, I'm told. I have no other English Autumns to compare it to, but it's in the mid-high seventies farenheit this week. Mick said it shouldn't be freezing yet, but it should be a lot cooler. The back of the house where the tv room and kitchen are catch the sun all day. This is also where I spend most of my time. Our bedroom/Mick's office is also on the back of the house. These rooms are really hot and stuffy and uncomfortable when it's warm. We've both retreated to the front sitting room which stays nice and cool all day.

Feeling less homesick, which is good.
Mick bought me some spicy candles that I can burn in the house, which reminds me of home, because mom always had spicy candles in autumn and winter.

Later guys :)

The Daily Shoot- Cucumbers and Crackers

My husband is a pusher- sometimes the good kind, sometimes the bad kind. Just what kind he is mostly depends on my mood. You see, I am not a pusher. I'm one of those people that needs to be pushed. I like to think of him as a little cattle dog biting at my ankles, trying to get me to go, go, go! Because, I'm a bit slow out of the gate. Once I get started with something and force myself to do it for a while, it eventually becomes habit, and I do well with it. But starting is always the hard part, and that's why it's a good thing I married Mick.

Lately he's been pushing me to do more with my photography. Homesickness is pretty ugly right now, and his sage advice is to do the things I can do that make me happy. And since I'm far from the people I love and miss, this means hobbies. I've always had a creative streak, going back to 4th grade when I wrote my first short story because my awesome teacher really pushed (see? pushing) us to write. We had a glorious silent half hour every morning where we could write anything we wanted. I took advantage of this, and my first story was a scattered conglomeration of the macabre- mummies, werewolves, spiderwebs, etc. Then I wrote my first poem at age 10, something that I've tried to stick with. But as I mentioned the other day, photography makes me feel really good about myself, and that's something I really need right now.

So this afternoon I sat down to my laptop and started looking for photography groups online. I found one called The Daily Shoot. Basically, this guy gives you an assignment every day and you take your photos and then share them on twitter to @dailyshoot. Now, I include my twitter feed on this page, so you should be able to see my name. If not, it's @aindrealm. I think this is a great idea, and today I completed my first assignment. It was technically yesterday's assignment, but it's okay if I'm a bit late, right? Like I said. I'm slow out of the gates.

September 28th, 2011(Day 682) Assignment-

Breakfast, lunch, or dinner. Make a photograph of a yummy part of one of your meals today.

My selection- snack of cucumber and Cracked Pepper Ryvita cracker. I love the way the sun shines through the skin of the cucumber on the left, the texture of the cracker, and the way you can even see where the serrations on the knife left indentations on the flesh of the cucumber.

So there you have it. I may not do this every single day, but I plan to do it several times a week and I'll try to share them all with you. If I forget to, just check my twitter feed on the right side of this page and you should be able see if I've done any.

See you soon :)

I promise to...

Spend more time doing the things that I love. This includes taking pictures.

I've been really homesick lately, the worst since I've been here. I guess that's to be expected though, but it doesn't mean it's easy. I don't want to dwell on that though, what I've come to say today is that I'm going to start doing things I love because that's what life is for, isn't it? I like the way I see things when I hold the camera, how I notice things that you'd never expect to make an interesting photo. But they do. Today I focused on the dog, Sasha. She sat still, not because she wanted to be my model but because she'd found a warm sunny spot to park it. Here you are.

Ahhh, off center and relatively shallow depth of field. I've missed this stuff.

Don't you just love the texture? The deserty, cracked nose and the fine hairs.

Such pretty paws.

And extreme angles.

I'm going to try to take pictures nearly every day and share them with you as often. I hope you'll enjoy seeing them.

A few photos

I got my camera back out of the wardrobe (what they call closets here) the other day and charged up my battery. I had to wait a few days to actually use it because it's been raining and my lense was getting wet. I've managed to snap a few, so I thought I share just a few photos of life around the house with Mick and Sasha, who keeps me company while Mick works.

Is there anything more beautiful than a flower with raindrops?

Lady Sasha

I adore the way Mick looks in this photo.