Hello

Some holiday photos for you

Merry Christmas

Merry Christmas to you all! I hope you have a wonderful day full of family, happiness, good food and good times. It's been a quiet but very lovely day here so far. We ate bagels with cream cheese and salmon with mimosas for breakfast and opened out presents with Mick's mom and his stepdad. I am astounded at the generosity these people have shown to me. I received such wonderful gifts that were unnecessary but so appreciated. We are about to eat our big Christmas dinner, then it's off to visit Grampy and then spend the evening with my sister in law, her boyfriend, and pops in law.

I was able to speak to all my family members last night. They are all celebrating at my parent's house in Yuma. I really wish Mick and I could be there, but I've managed from being too bummed. Next year will be here before we know it. I will also speak to my family again tonight, but until then I'm going to dedicate this little song to them, courtesy of Judy Garland.




Have yourself a merry little Christmas,
Let your heart be light,
Next year all our troubles will be
out of sight

Have yourself a merry little Christmas
Make the yule-tide gay
Next year all our troubles will be
miles away

Once again as in olden days
Happy golden days of yore
Faithful friends who were near to us
Will be dear to us once more

Someday soon, we all will be together
If the Fates allow
Until then, we'll have to muddle through somehow
So have yourself a merry little Christmas now.

Going the Distance

In writing this blog, in telling the story of Aindrea and Mick, and in talking to people face to face, I've been surprised to hear how many of them (the women, really) want what I have. I'm not surprised that they want a fantastic husband who is also your best friend, but they want the whole process. It happens almost daily, a customer at the pub will notice that I'm obviously not from around here, ask where I'm from.
"America"
"Oh, what are you doing all the way over here."
"I married an Englishman."
"Oh, how did you meet?"
"We met online as teenagers. Over the years we kept in touch finally met, and now here we are."
"Oh, how romantic, what a love story!"
And I'm always a little bit surprised. Even a friend of mine said to me once, "I want what you have. I want that love story and I want a British boy."
We all want a love story, and we all deserve a great one. British men are plenty nice, but they're still just men. What I don't think people realize is just how hard it all is, and how much it entails. I love Mick more that anything in the world, but would I recommend that any couple go through what we did? Absolutely not. It's hard, it hurts, you find the most stupid things to argue about when you're apart, and you just end up not being very nice to each other a lot of the time. Not because you're horrible or you don't love each other, but because you're so frustrated with the situation and you don't know how else to express it. We were only apart for 7 months, but in that time, we had a lot of arguments, a lot of doubts, and I even had to visit the ER twice because I was in so much stress, I had a panic attack that lasted for several days.
Mick and I have both talked about this, and we have agreed that if, for some reason (God forbid) things didn't work out for us, we wouldn't do this again, with another person. Would I do it again, with Mick? Yes, because what we have is special and unbreakable. It takes unquestionable and complete trust, a lot of faith, and the kind of love you only find once in a lifetime.
I think it's really important that people don't limit themselves. If you decide at some point in your life that you're going to have, x,y,z (in my friends case, a British man), you're going to be focused on only one area. And if you do that, you're going to limit yourself and you might miss out on something really fantastic. Perhaps a Swedish guy? An Australian guy? A guy from New York or Vancouver, or, most desirably, a guy from your own town. Don't put yourself in a box, be open to life and all the surprises that life sends your way. I didn't plan to fall in love with an English boy, but it fell in my lap, I discovered how important he was to me and I decided that, come hell or high water, I'd fight to keep him. We can't help who we love, and so that also means that you can't make yourself love someone. You might find someone who checks all the boxes on your list, but at the end of the day, you might really surprise yourself with what you actually want.

Today I met a girl in the pub, and she asked all those typical questions. Once she realized we had been long distance, she immediately launched into all these questions about how she should handle a sitation with a guy that is long distance. I immediately recalled the insecurities, the desperation, the excitement, and the sadness. Let me tell you, I didn't envy this girl one little bit. I basically told her that she just had to be open, honest, and decide what would work for her, and would just have to go with the flow.
And then she spoke the words, "but I don't want to just wait and see, I want to know."
I could have laughed out loud. Not because it's funny what she said, or that it's so unusual or unreasonable to want to know how love will turn out, but because I can remember saying that to my mom, or to Brittany, curled up on her couch and wallowing in the distance. "I just want to know if we're going to make it." Over and over. I was such a broken record. I wished the girl luck and walked away wondering when I'd become Dr. Love, but I was glad to be able to help, because I certainly know how she feels.
Nobody has a crystal ball (as my mom has told me over and over and over my entire life when I worry about something) and we can't know how something is going to turn out.
But isn't not knowing half the fun?

I guess I just wanted to bring some light to the situation. I'm not saying I'm not really happy, because I am. I have snagged an amazing opportunity- I'm living in another country and learning about another culture, I'm a newlywed and the world is my oyster. But we're still a couple, like anyone else. We fight. I'm sometimes really unreasonable, and he's sometimes really insensitive. I get sad and homesick and want to go home somedays, and he gets sad about that. But each day, we wake up in the same bed, happy to see the other there. And that's all we wanted for so very long.

You just have to greet life with open arms, take what it gives you, and turn that into something that makes you want to get up every day and smile at the world. I found it in an English boy, but you mind find it somewhere else. And that is beautiful.

London Getaway

Yesterday afternoon Mick and I returned from our mini trip to London. We went up early on Monday and stayed the night. We walked and walked (as one does when in London) and finished up our Christmas shopping, saw some of our favourites sights again, and enjoyed good food. In the evening we hailed a cab and went past Buckingham Palace and Horse Guard Parade and Trafalgar Square and got dropped off in front of the Garrick Theatre. Chicago did not disappoint. The music was great ad America Fererra was fantastic. Even Mick didn't hate it too much.
After the show we visited the M&Ms store in Leicester Square, then caught another can back to the hotel, where we slept the sleep of people who walked miles in a cold and rainy city. I'm the morning we had breakfast at a pub near the hotel, then we walked past Marble Arch over to Hyde Park for the winter wonderland carnival. We drank mulled wine, are roasted chestnuts, and Mick even won me a little stuffed pig shooting Christmas ornaments. After that it was back to the hotel to grab our things and get a cab to the train station. Neither of us wanted to leave - it was wonderful to have some us time, and I for one came home feeling very full of love.
I just love London in the winter, especially at Christmastime.
Have some pictures :)

Snow and Musicals

I'm really, really cold!

It snowed on Friday morning. I was sitting in bed, looking at my phone. Checked the weather, saw it was meant to be snowing. I started an epic battle with the sheets in order to get to the window. Mick muttered angrily and asked what I was doing. Away to the window I flew with a flash, tore back the shutters and opened the sash (couldn't resist) and, yes, IT WAS SNOWING! I took some pictures, but you couldn't really tell that it was snowing, and it didn't stick or anything. Boo. It was nice for the couple hours while it lasted!
I have three days off, so tomorrow Mick and I are taking the train up to London for a little Christmas-y goodness! We're going to go to a few winter markets to finish up our Christmas shopping and then, tomorrow night....

We're going to see Chicago in the West End! I've never been to the theatre, and for some reason, even though he's been bitching about it since, Mick offered to take me to see a musical. I jumped at the chance, although I've forbidden him from complaining about it. Why take me somewhere to enjoy something just to ruin it with complaining, right?
Anyways, it should be a really good couple days. We're staying in London tomorrow night and catching the train home midday Wednesday. I'm really looking forward to getting away and having some time together, I've been working a good deal lately and we've actually been pretty busy!
Here's what's been going on lately in photos :)
Hope everyone is having a good pre-Christmas week!

First time living somewhere that it snows!

This is where I work.

Some holiday nibbles and gift wrapping.

Wintry mornings

Transitions

Winter creeps in so slowly that you don't even notice it. I check my phone weather forecast and each week the first digit in temperatures drops. It's only in the 40s now, due to be 30s next week. I know that's not as cold as a lot of the places you folks live, but I've been told the cold in England is different, and I have to take people's words for it, having spent exactly no time in cold climes before. Apparently it's the damp that does it here. It gets in your bones. Or so I'm told.
So, as winter presses her nose against the window, peering in and preparing herself to settle in heavily, Mick and I prepare for something as well. It's time to dip our toes into apartment hunting. We've looked at one place, but for our reasons we've decided to keep looking elsewhere, even though we really liked it. Nothing serious yet, no paperwork has been filled out, we're just collecting out data, looking online, and planning to go look. And, oh, is it exciting!

A Slightly Hyper Post

Today I worked from 10am-6pm with a slew of families swinging in and out the door. The comfy, worn in couches scattered about the warm pub were filled with laughter and chit-chat, and my hands were satisfied and sticky from pulling lots and lots of pints. Two o'clock rolled around and my boss said I could take my break. I donned my wool coat and scarf (never thought I'd say that!) and walked across the square to the supermarket to buy a sandwich and a drink. My selections in hand (chicken salad sandwich, strawberry flavored water and sour coke bottles), I paid and exited the store. To my immense puzzlement, as I walked through the sliding doors, I was accosted (ok, not really, I just never pass up an opportunity to use that word. Accosted. Accosted! I love it) by charity collectors holding their plastic coin cup things and wearing... wait for it!.... GIANT DOG COSTUMES. We're not just talking a painted face and ears, people. We're talking the hole getup- a full on furry costume with giant head and everything. Actually, it was probably pretty warm, now that I think about it. Anyway, there was Christmas music blaring from mysteriously placed speakers and booths and things set up. In a daze, I grabbed a few coins from my pocket and chucked them in the cup. The Giant Dog I deposited my money to waved with his big, fake, awkward hands. Character costumes like that have always freaked me out a bit. I don't know, it might be the vow of silence the people who wear them seem to take. It's just weird, okay?!
Anyways, I retreated to the safety of my designated lunch spot- a tree planter with a large base to sit on. I munched on my sandwich and watched the way the light played on the pavers, the sides of brick buildings, and shone around the corner, bursting through a narrow walkway. I fell in love with winter light today. And as I snapped pictures, a children's choir at the charity thing began to sing "Good King Wenceslas," which always reminds me of that scene in the end of Love Actually where Hugh Grant is desperately searching an entire street of houses, asking for the girl he loves, tryyying to find out if she lives there because she only gave him the name of the street she lived on and not the house number. And three little girls open the door and don't realize Hugh Grant is the Prime Minister, because they're like, seven. So they ask if he's a Carol Singer and he starts to sing to humor them. And his driver, who is standing behind him, busts out in this really sexy bass voice, and Hugh Grant does this surprised little face and turns around and looks at the driver. (I tried to find a clip on youtube to no avail). It always makes me smile, as does anything to do with Hugh Grant, and particularly Love Actually. I smiled and snapped pictures until my hands started to go numb, at which point I decided it was probably time to go back to work.

My lunch spot. I love how the concrete and wood eat up the light and hold it tight.

Pavers also enjoy eating the light. Also- I much prefer the footwear of bartending to the footwear of teaching. Vans to work? Yes, please!

This picture literally stops my breath. The way the light bends around the building and down this little walkway. Be still, my heart!

Have a fantastic Saturday, you!

Some Randomness for You

Some things you may not know.

I detest the feeling of lipstick and lip gloss. My lips go au natural 99% of the time- weddings qualify as lipstick time. However, I have found lip stain, which doesn't bother me.

I have a strange fondness for dandelion clocks (that's the actual name for dandelion poofy ball thingies)

I love the smell of spicy candles.

I've wanted to be a writer since I was 9. Wrote my first story in 4th grade and my first poem in 5th.

I inherited the shutterbug gene from my maternal grandfather.

I love the smell of baby head. You know, fresh out of the bath, wrapping them up in a towel, and just burying your nose into their wispy hair and breathing in real deep. My niece has been a victim of this activity a time or two.

I'm a real believer in the "live and let live" outlook on life. I feel like way too many people express anger at situations that don't really involve them or affect them. So what if those guys want to get married? So what if that lady isn't Christian? So what if that girl is covered in tattoos from head to toe? Does that mean the world is coming to an end? Does it mean that I can't carry on in my life and hold true to the things that I've been taught and value the most? Absolutely not. Times will always change, people will always say things we don't like. And that, my friends, is beautiful. At the end of the day, you probably should be looking at yourself and your own life more than spending time obsessing about what's happening outside. Start at home. I'm not saying we should ignore what happens in the world, or that we shouldn't try and make a difference, but it's important to tell the difference between what we can change and what we can't... and that moaning about it won't make the difference.

I believe in a strong work ethic. My parents pounded into me from a very young age that it is important to be at work or school. I wasn't allowed to take a day off "just because" and I don't let myself do it now.

I never had a blanket or stuffed animal that I drug all over the place as a child. I did, however, have a pillow that went on all overnight trips with me. I still have that pillow, and it has traveled the world with me, thank you very much.

I love to cook. I'm pretty new to it, but my mother in law handed me the reigns to the kitchen when I moved to England. It's been a bit off since I've started working and have been ill, but we had some pretty cool meals there for a while.

My husband drives me crazy, in every sense of the word. He can say things that baffle me, enrage me, confuse me, amuse me, or just make my heart melt. It's weird how things deepen the longer you love someone. I feel like every day he grows more handsome in my eyes. He doesn't change physically, of course, but as I learn more about him and love him more, those things show in his face.

I have serious guilt issues. Like, if I do something even remotely naughty (as silly as not putting something back where I found it) I have an internal battle about how horrible I am.

I have a dangerous addiction to Diet Coke and Coke Zero. I don't have it every day or anything, but if it's in the house, there's a good chance I won't drink any water until it's gone. For the most part we keep it out of the house, but I'll treat it to myself when we go out.

We are movie people. Every night, Mick and I select a film to watch, take refuge on the couch and dive in. We often pause for tea breaks and discussions- occasionally it'll be an in depth plot analysis, but typically we criticize acting skills and continuity errors.

I require three pillows when I sleep: said comfort childhood pillow, one to go underneath it because it's pretty much flat and dead, and another to wrap myself around because husband can't cuddle during sleep. Bummer.

I have a hunger for traditions and heirlooms and look forward to making rich, deep histories for the children I will someday have.

I was raised to be proud of my ancestry.

I love trying new things- whether it's an activity, a food, a game or a new place, I'm usually willing to try it. I even tried eating Black Pudding (see: pig's blood mixed with herbs and spices, fried and made like a sausage) a few weeks ago.

I am a roller coaster junkie- love the rush!

I love a good lazy day, but enjoy a busy day out doing things as well.

And I love, love love to take pictures.

Finding Winter

I've never experienced a real winter, having grown up in Southern California and Arizona. I remember one particularly cold "winter" in Arizona, I was walking to class one morning at the college. I walked across the grass and was a bit bemused when it started to crunch beneath my feet. Frost?! That is something we're seeing more of these days, now that I'm in England.

Such amazing patterns to be found in ice and frost. Little trails, mountains, rivers and valleys to explore with the eye. I found myself hoping this morning, when I woke and heard someone coughing and rattling objects in what should have been an empty house. I could tell the cough belonged to my mother in law. At first I assumed illness, but then quickly replaced that idea with a hope of snowy roads and no way for her to get to work. A glance out the window erased this dream, and an explanation of car trouble answered my question.

This approaching winter not only brings the normal things for me - my mother and sister's birthdays, Christmas, warm fires and time spent together, keeping warm on the inside, hot drinks and snuggles. This year, winter holds more for me; an exploration of a new season, new elements and a whole world of winter wonderland to discover. Mick and I hope to make it up to London before Christmas for some shopping in Camden and Greenwich Markets, perhaps catching a musical at a theatre in the West End. This winter will be a walkway into my new life, in this new place, with my new husband. What an adventure! 

Viral Breeding Ground

Well, it finally happened. I always had some cold or another when I was teaching. Coming into contact with so many hygenically-challenged teenagers meant I came face to face with lots and lots of germs. And so for two years of teaching, I had a cold every couple of months. Since living in England I didn't even encounter a single sniffle- that is until last week. I started getting a chesty cold and cough around Thursday, sore throat and nearly lost my voice at work on Saturday. Now it's the whole shebang- runny nose, coughing, sneezing, hacking, chest rattling with mucus, pounding head and sinuses. Oh yeah, it's a veritable germ sensation in my body right now.
I just find it really annoying that I went for months without getting anything, and as soon as I have a place to be and responsibilities, I get sick. Like the sickest I've been in a while.

Work is going well. It's a learning process and a pretty fast paced environment so I'm trying to keep up. I think I'm doing really well but I'm still new. I do struggle with understanding people's accents. One such amusing occasion was when someone asked for "bitter lemon" with their drink (type of juice) and I happily plunked a slice of lemon in their glass, thinking I heard "a bit of lemon." We all shared a laugh at my expense, but that's okay. It was pretty funny.
Thankfully though, I have two days off work to try and recover. Hopefully I'll be feeling more human by Friday night. I think I have a chance if I stick to my survival kit- cough drops, ginger ale, hot drinks, cold medicine, jammies and the couch.
Hope everyone is feeling better than I am!

A Moment

It happened Saturday night. The pub was relentlessly busy, a coworker had a sick son and couldn't make it in, so three of us were pulling it together and making it work without so much as a breath between customers. I was baptised with fire that night, learning by doing. I stood, mixing a Malibu and diet coke facing the back part of the bar where all the spirits are stored. I glanced up to reach for something and caught my face in the mirrored back-splash. I looked younger than I have felt in a few years; fresh faced and wide eyed, eating up the new. I thought about how much my life has changed in the past year. That tired, drawn "teacher face" is gone. I saw freshness, newness. I thought of my Mick, and of the huge thing I've done for him- us, even for me at the end of the day. I saw myself mixing this drink and suddenly felt the positive impact this huge transition has had on me. Everything shifted, fell in place and aligned in one of those moments where you are suddenly very aware of your little place in the universe. It hit me that the steps are all over- we are done with visas (for two years), I managed to snag the first job I applied for, and we are in motion. Things are happening now, and this is the life that was planned for me, the very same one that I chose.
I remembered my teenage dream- moving to Ireland and opening a pub. I had to chuckle- I made it to England, and am working in a pub. Not exactly on target, but a very pleasant alternative. And the thing that makes it all worthwhile? That boy who stole my heart when I was 17 and took me as his wife three months ago. I felt peace, and turned to mix the next drink, once again absorbed in the sounds of inebriated laughter, clanking bottles, and cheerful banter.
And so after work this afternoon, I ran to the store to buy a sandwich for a late lunch, found myself a new pair of gloves and a scarf, and bought that boy I love so much the pair of slippers he pointed out a while back.
Which may or may not have gorilla faces. I'll never tell ;)

Photo Phrenzy

A new job, coldwetwindy weather, the beginnings of a chest cold (or at the very least, an icky cough) a date night and the house to ourselves this weekend. That was our week.
Have some photos.

Like a Duck to Water

I started my job last night. Everything went really well! Started out doing the obligatory paperwork and safety run throughs- moral of the story, "don't be an idiot, use common sense." I can handle that. I was shown how to use the till by the manager. Took a few minutes to figure out but she said I was quick with it. I had to use a similar computer thingy when I worked at Outback. I had a really good time, all the other bar staff was really nice. There were lots of friendly customers who seemed to love the fact that I'm American and wanted to know all about how I got here, what my husband did, and our story in general. I can be a bit of a ham at times, so I did quite enjoy being a bit of a novelty. Is that bad?
I had so much fun that I was a little bit disappointed when my shift ended and went out to meet Mick waiting for me in the parking lot. My legs and feet were tired, but I was having a good time! Some of the other girls made comments about how I didn't seem as scared as they did their first night, or that I was taking to it "like a duck to water." It feels good to be confident about a job on the first day. My last new job was teaching, and there is nothing in the world more terrifying than meeting 150+ kids in one day and being handed the responsibility for their education for a year. This was a bit intimidating, just because I was put behind the bar with people I didn't know, asking what I could get for customers and struggling to understand their accents and nicknames for drinks. I caught on quick that a "Boom" is the colloquial for Oranjeboom, and Guinness and Black is Guinness with blackcurrant syrup. An Asahi with a top just means a splash of sprite on top of the pint. Though England is a small country, just about every town has it's own accent, I'm learning. Figuring out how to understand all of them is a bit of a task! But for the most part I was able to make it seem like I just couldn't hear people in the loud pub. Hehe.

Everything I know about Pubs, I learned from The Nag's Head- the pub featured in the British comedy, Only Fools and Horses. The Nag's Head was the hub of the community, where lovable (apart from Boyce) characters gathered after a day of hard work to visit with friends and have a breather.

(Dave - er, Rodney, Trigger (the love of my life!) and Del Boy 'avin a pint at the Nag's 'ead)

 

I was happy to learn that this is a pretty accurate portrayal of a pub. Though it was my first night, I could pick out the regulars- the jovial, friendly ones who made smalltalk and had amusing conversations with the rest of the bar staff; the ones who asked when I was working next, because they were sure to be here; the lovely couple who were eager to hear my story and were pleased to learn that we only lived up the street from one another, then made my heart melt a bit when they said they always end up best friends with the bar staff. I felt like I found my Nag's Head- a place of my own in this country where I feel like so little is my own. Bit by bit, I'm handed the bricks to build my life here, and it feels good to get some foundations set.

Working Girl

Good news! I got myself a job :D Sunday midday I got a call from the local pub, where I dropped off my resume earlier in the week. The manager asked if she could interview me. I went yesterday, and felt that it went really well. Then this afternoon she called back to offer me a full time position as bar staff. It's 35 hours a week, a mixture of nights, days, weekdays and weekends. It's close- just a few minute walk. The pay is respectable, plus I'll get 5 weeks of vacation a year. Yes, Europe is way more laid back about giving employees time off. Americans get the shaft. Annnyways, I've spent a good amount of time working in restaurants, which I always enjoyed, so I'm really pleased! It's also such a relief to find full time work so quickly- not going to lie, I was pretty worried.
I think it's pretty fun that I've moved away to England and have managed to land a very English job- pulling pints and wiping down the bar, serving food, etc. I'm really looking forward to it. I start this Thursday. Wish me luck!

I'm so happy that everything about moving here has gone so smoothly. Both visas and the national insurance number were all obtained easily and with no hassle. And now a job so quickly. I'm so thankful that things are settling into place. God is good! I hope this trend continues!

Bringing Thanksgiving to the Redcoats

What a great, full weekend we had here- visiting friends, attending parties, and for me, lots of cooking! Saturday night I began my cooking for our little belated Thanksgiving which we would hold on Sunday. It's hard to do Thanksgiving on Thursday here, because nobody has time off, obviously, since it isn't celebrated here. But that wasn't going to stop me- we pushed it to Sunday.
I did my two casseroles (sweet potato as well as twice baked potato), put them in the fridge to bake the following day, and left the turkey out to defrost.
When we woke up Sunday morning, hubby and I walked to the store for some last minute ingredients and came back to the house so I could get started on the pumpkin pie. I had ordered pie filling from amazon (not available here!) and got my store-bought crust out of the refrigerator to place in the pie dish. It was square instead of round, so I had to knead it and roll it out to make it fit the pie dish. Took care of it, placed it in the dish- looking good! Pop it in the oven to flash bake. Cool. I decided to check on it after a minute or two only to discover that the crust was slipping down the edges and settling in a pathetic puddle at the bottom of the dish. I freaked out, shouted for Mick, and got all teary. I'm not sure that it was really the crust that got me so upset. More likely it was the fact that I didn't get to have Thanksgiving with my family, didn't want to ruin the pie because it's my favourite part of Thanksgiving, and it was just a hectic morning. Back we went to the store to get more pasty ( 4!) and another pie dish, because the one at the house was shaped weird (straight edges instead of angles), which I thought added to the problem. We rushed home and I started over. It started to do the same thing, but only on one little edge of the crust, so I pulled it out of the oven and patched up the spot with extra pastry (which had been frozen and had to be thawed! Ugh!). Back in the oven to finishing flash bake and out in a few minutes. It looked pretty compromised, but it was holding together. In went the pumpkin mixture to finish baking. It all turned out fine, and tasted just like it should!
This was the only mishap of the day, apart from the store-bought apple pie that didn't want to bake. But that was okay, because we just did our dessert in two stages. Most of my Brits had never had pumpkin pie before, and they all seemed to like it. Even Mick, who had been more skeptical than the rest, said he really enjoyed it. And he is one picky man!
So thanks to my wonderful husband, his mom and step-dad, my sister in law and her boyfriend, I was able to have a Thanksgiving. And they helped make it special.
Hope you all had a wonderful weekend with your families and friends!

Centerpiece

My mom's side of the family always had gherkins and olives out on Thanksgiving. It wouldn't have felt legit without them!

My pie didn't look all that great, but it tasted perfect :)

I think I did Mama proud!

Pretty table

I know this is an awkward picture, but I swear- my husband does know what a camera is. He just hates them.

The turkey!