I think part of me was resigned to the fact that I would give up this blog. Life was busy (as it always is) and I didn't have the time or inspiration to continue to make this space a beautiful one. But I must make a confession - I have been a downright nasty person to be around as of late. My poor, dear, sweet husband has caught the brunt of it and most of the time I didn't even realise how horrible I was being until I saw the hurt in his eyes after an argument settled, or until I heard the anger in his voice.
The only thing I know is that when I am stressed and frazzled, I become un-fun and snappy. I become a lot like a teenager who doesn't like to hear any criticism, but especially the word "no."
I need a therapy, of sorts, to keep myself happy. Expressing goes a long way. I remember back in high school, I used to dump my stresses during my least favourite (and weakest) subject- math. It would have done me a lot more good, academically, to sit and pay attention, but it did more for my state of mind to get out some notebook paper and just write. I wrote poems, short stories, even took a few cracks at novels. Nothing ever came of it and sadly, I've lost most of those poems and stories, but it felt good. Another release I discovered around the same time was photography. I found that, after a teenage argument with my mother, a trip to the desert with my little digital camera did me a lot of good. A few years later, I took a photography course at the community college and invested in a good little starter digital SLR. I would lose myself behind the lense, become engrossed in finding the perfect shutter and f-stop combination, and find delight in tweaking the focus just right. Whatever worries plagued my mind could be easily forgotten. In a world where I so often feel like I have no control, getting behind the viewfinder and manipulating the settings of a camera, taking a world that, to me, in that moment, feels ugly, and changing it into something beautiful with this little machine makes me feel ok and reminds me that there is always beauty to be find.
And so, I resolve to write here regularly again, and to take more pictures. I got my camera out a few weeks ago and it sits on the piano (no, we don't play [though Mick can dabble], but it sure is a great place to set all our crap).
So, what has happened since August? Sheesh. A lot. Let me break it down by month for you.
September:
We celebrated our one year anniversary in London. Mick's mom and dad bought us tickets to see "We Will Rock You," a West End musical based on the music of Queen. Oh, did we love it. I quickly bought all of Queen's greatest hits that I was missing. A few days later I started a new job for a recruitment company that specialises in accountancy and fiance. I do a lot of administrative type work, and it's a really great place to work. The people are great and I'm always kept on my toes. A few days later Mick caught up with me by turning 26. Hah.
November:
I had a nasty cold that stopped me dead in my tracks. Mom sent me some Thanksgiving decorations to get me out of an autumn/germy funk. We celebrated a big of a Celtic Thanksgiving, plus a South African. The food was good and I enjoyed being in the kitchen all day.
December:
The countdown to my biggest wish was dwindling down - on December 15th we hopped on a plane and got to visit home for the first time since I moved here. We spent two weeks with my family, time split between Arizona and Southern California. I caught up with my parents and siblings, loved up on my niece and nephew, and shared good laughs with good friends whom I've missed loads. The time went too fast, and with a confusing mixture of sadness and joy, we came back to England.
February:
Another move... Mick's dad kindly asked us if we'd like to rent his house since he is remarrying and moving in with his lucky lady. We were ecstatic for the opportunity to live in the beautiful village in a lovely house with a lot more space and room to grow.
March:
I passed my driving test the first time (quite an accomplishment in England, the driving tests are brutal here!) and got a new car, a lovely little Skoda which may or may not take a lot of work...
That pretty much brings you up to date. There have been other things in between, which I'll share in photos.
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| Continuing developing my cooking skills |
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| Spending as much time as possible with this guy |
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| A fair amount of snow this winter (that's our new house from the garden!) |
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| And a lot of ice... |
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| And just enough down-time to keep me going |
xo
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